Happy 45th Birthday Singapore!
It's Singapore's birthday today. 45 years of independence. A little red dot.
Yes, I admit that there are times whereby I am not proud to be a Singaporean or even forgot that I am a Singaporean. However, end of the day, this is still home. My family and friends are here. My fav F&B haunts are within reach. I can walk safely at night without being too fearful of my safety. I know we are shielded from natural disasters (the flash floods that occurred recently are not 'disasters'! Get a grip!). We have a world class transport system! The arts, literature and sports community is getting better as the years go by.
True, comparing to our economic achievements, Singapore is still culturally and politically backward. But, we are only 45 years old. Think of other developed countries who were 45 years old. Their achievements weren't that great either.
It saddens me to hear friends saying 'Singapore is so boring, nothing to do.'. Well, FIND things to do then! Don't be lazy! Have a picnic at Botanic Gardens! Volunteer your time with SPCA. Sniff out interesting F&B areas. Organise outings! There are so MANY things to do. Reality is what we create to live in; not living in what has been created.
Listening to: 'Lights' by February Air
Back after 3 years of absence
I nearly forgot all about this blog of mine until I was looking at my 'Favourites' list in my web browser. It's been over 3 years since my last entry back in 2007. Many things have happened during my absence from the blogosphere.
In recent months, I slowly come to realise that I am not as good a friend as I think and want to be. Some colleagues in the office disliked my personality so much that they wish I will disappear (their wish will be fulfiled when I leave my company on 31 Aug). Even though I try to have the best interests of 2 friends, one of them ended up sending me a hurtful sms and insulting the other person. I was HURT but I chose to be 'professional' about it. Another friend has been really honest and forthcoming of her opinions about me. I am thankful for that because I am forced to face reality.
To me, privacy is very important and that's one of the key reasons why I am not on Facebook. Sure, there are 'privacy settings' but how private can that be? After all, all posts are reflected in the network and it's a public realm. There are so-called friends that I would never want to be connected with. Sounds cruel? Guess, I am vocalising the inner thoughts of some 'Facebookers' as well.
Sometimes, I try to be happy when I am hurting inside. Perhaps it's pride.......It irks me to be fragile or vulnerable.
Tonight's post is a random one. Very random.
All about cards
After 2 months of hiatus, I am BACK BACK BACK!! It's not that I am lazy (well, I admit that I am at times..who doesn't? Sheesh!) to update this private space of mine, the main reason being that I can't access blogspot most of the time. Maybe it is time for me to change the OS to to MS Vista. I used it for a while previously and honestly, I was grappling with the new features in the new platform.Anyway, I shall reserve my comments regarding Vista in a later blog entry (*crosses fingers*) if I can access blogspot againI have got so much to write but well, it's 1am now and I am very tired.Supposed to sleep at 11.30pm after watching Ugly Betty but I hung on to watch another episode of the Korean drama 'The Wedding'. Now, as usual, being the good friend to my circle of friends, I am editting the survey for one of my girlfriends. It is for her research paper. It has been 2 years since I construct and edit surveys. Long long time....I still have a pile of work waiting for me to finish. Well, I seem to be blabbering on and off here, talking about many things at one time. Do pardon me for this yah. Have to grab hold of this one and only rare opportunity that I can access blogspot. NEWS NEWS: I will be closing this blog by end of March and move on to livejournal. Shall provide the hyperlink.So watch out for this space!Earlier, I was rummaging through my box of cards and alot of memories came flooding into my mind. I love cards, as in paper cards with written messages by your friends and family. Nothing, absolutely nothing, beats the feeling of holding the card in your hand and reading off the messages (be it long or short). When people ask me, "What do you want for your birthday?" I usually tell them to include a card. Some may find it really strange that I have such requests. However, to me, cards are very precious in this fast-paced, digital, 'paper-less' and 'emails-infested' world. I love to buy cards for people and send them to matter what the occasion(s) is(are). Blank cards are my obsession, especially those with unique and colourful designs. Recommendations:- Prints shop (they can be found at Raffles City, City Link Mall)
- Borders
- Fundecko @ Far East Plaza
- Anthropology @ Holland Village
- Paper People @ Far East Plaza
In that box of cards collected through the years, some of them evoked strong emotions as I read the messages in them.
- I teared at one of them,given to me by my girlfriend last year. We had just revived our friendship and that particular birthday card holds painful memories
- I smiled at the Christmas card given to me by HL,Syl and YL in 2004. Such a huge card with meaningful messages
- One of the birthday cards had turned slightly yellow, already more than 5 years old. That was given to me by my JC mate. Known her since 17 years old!
- A Christmas card given to me by Jeanne. Hand made! A very sweet gesture from a darling whom I have known since 17 years old.
- Another Christmas card given to me by HL. I laughed at that because it was one of the 'more than 10 year old' cards I have in my 'treasury'. Simpyl precious and pricesless that money cannot buy.
- And many many more
To me, cards hold a special place in my heart and occasionally, I will pour all of them on the floor and read every single one of them again and again. Images of the past will flood my mind like a movie being played over and over again. Sounds nostalgic yah? That's a side of me that not many people know.....
*listening to: 'Stay' by Brian McKnight
2006 for me
Woohoo!! Finally I am able to post an entry! For the past one week, I have been trying to access Blogspot to post some entries. However, this situation ALWAYS happened >>> The webpage will hang after I have signed in to Blogspot. Initially, I thought that it was some technical errors as Blogspot might be migrating to another platform to enhance its features. ..but no...=SAnyway, I read one of my friend's blog and she did a '2006 for me' kind of entry...So I have decided to do mine too! Hey I ain't a copycat ok, she was 'inspired' by Glenn Ong and The Flying Dutchman...so who's the copycat? *giggles*2006 For MeForay into the world of exhibitionsMany people view 'exhibitionists' having one of the most glamourous jobs in the world, all the glitter on the showfloor. Well, you are wrong if you think this way. You have not seen the unglamourous part of it >> the months of planning and late nights (and I mean really late such as till 3-4am in the morning in the quiet office). My friends will vouch that I was so busy during my stay in the exhibitions line that they do not even dare to text me frequently! As I looked back, I did not regret making the choice of joining the exhibitions line in 2006. Rewarding.Exciting though can be frustrating at times. I have learnt and 're-learnt' alot last year and I am grateful for all that has been taught to me. Sometimes I wondered how I had persevered on...Getting fitHaving a pantry in the office that has delectable food and snacks can be both a blessing and a curse! I had gained 2-3kgs last year due to the frequent visits to the pantry. Thank goodness I joined a fitness club and have been consistent in attending their group exercise classes. Also, I have made some really good friends there. They are a source of motivation for me! By His grace, I have shed off 3 kgs during the past 2 months. =) The gym is definitely one of the greatest blessings in 2006!Spiritual journeyI left my current church for another community church after being in the former since 1997. I felt that it was getting too big for my comfort. Spiritually, I wasn't progressing after I left. And as the Bible says, 'Faith comes by hearing the Word of God'. Constant absence in the church means not being fed well and this had affected my faith level in 2006. I was prone to wavering faith and disbelief in many things. That, I strongly believe, has led to my low level of confidence in many areas of my life last year. Now that I am back in my current church, I feel like the prodigal son in the Bible. Am so glad that He did not forsake me (He will never! amen) and had and will always be with me wherever I go. One year of absence and spiritual hunger made me realise that 'man does not live on bread alone but by the everlasting Word of God'. Roppongi, TokyoFinally, I travelled on my own (partly, coz I was staying with a friend) to Japan. It was a really enriching experience. Japan,in my eyes, is really a cosmopolitan and vibrant country! She is at the forefront of cutting-edge technologies while at the same time, a leader in constructing eccentric bits of culture that's ready to be exported to other parts of the world. I would love to return again to the 'Land of the Rising Sun' and explore parts of the country in greater depth!Marriage,graduation and dream came true!I was thrilled to be part of the lives of my 3 good friends who experienced different forms of happiness in 2006. Sylvia got married in October to her boyfriend of 5 years.She was indeed a gorgeous bride that day,radiating pure joy in her eyes. Hueyling (affectionately known as HL to us) graduated in November with a Bachelor degree. I am very proud of her achievement and congratulate her on a job well done! As for the fashionista in our group, Miss Yiling started her candidature in the exciting and oo-la-la world of fashion! It was certainly a dream came true for her. As pastor said during the New Year Eve's service, 2007 is a year of new beginnings for the church. 'New beginnings' mean differently for different people.I asked God for three 'new beginnings' in my life this year. Am unsure how and when He will answer my prayers. However one thing I know for sure is that, He is neither early nor late but always JIT (Just In Time). =PListening to: 'I'm Forever Yours' by Planetshakers
My mum gave a cold joke today
My mum seldom jokes, and trust me, when she does, it is akin to striking lottery *grins* . Earlier, my aunt came over our house and joined us for dinner. As usual, we will gather in front of the goggle box after dinner to chat about everything and anything. Moments later, I came out of my room holding onto samples of The Body Shop products and introduced the Strawberry Body Butter to my aunt. She is a simple and n0-frills person and seldom pampers herself with bodycare products that are expensive. To her, products from The Body Shop are considered 'expensive'. I explained to her in Mnadarin on what the body butter was and the application method. So, when my mum heard that the butter contained strawberry seed oil (as indicated on the label), she jokingly said, "Wah! That will be sweet smelling right? Would it attract the ants at night when she sleeps? What if an army of ants move her from her bed?!" For a couple of seconds, I was dumbfounded and then I burst into boisterous laughter. My mum and aunt were already laughing away, almost with tears and in their eyes. I mean, if you know my mum as much as I do, she seldom jokes...and this is really a classic moment! *giggles*. I told her, "Ma, you really said a 'cold joke'（冷笑话）" She just grinned from ear to ear...I really love my mum for who she is...sometimes we bicker and go through thunderous arguments. I even shout at her (come on, before you judge me, do you admit that you have NEVER shouted at your parents?) but she doesn't shout back unless she cannot take it. You know, we behave the worst in front of our family members and very close friends. However, we are at our best behaviour in front of strangers and friends. To me, she is the best mum I can ever ask for. It ain't easy for a woman of her times to be a single mum and raise her daughter all the way to university. Though she does not have high educational qualifications and special skills, she persevered and worked really hard. Somehow I can go on and on about her..shall do that in the next blog entry...=)*listening to: 'Feelin' So Good' by Olivia Ong
A new beginning in Jan 2007
It has been almost 6 weeks since I left my company as my contract has expired. I do miss the work, after all I was kept really busy since the beginning of the year. My friends can vouch that I was practically spending every Saturday in the office, all by myself. Pre-show work was very intensive especially the 3 months leading up to the tradeshow. After the show, everything became quiet. It's weird, kind of like surreal coz you are so used to the busy-ness and running around.With no jobs in the queue (how I wish that will happen!!), I had to start looking for another job. And, thanks be to God, I am moving on to another MNC next month! *beams* A totally new environment for me, kind of male-dominated workplace. I hope that the social environment will be conducive for work and play. Above all, I pray for supernatural favour with my team-mates and my manager.The new beginning will commence on 10 Jan 2007. As I was telling my friends, I am looking forward yet apprehensive to it. I guess it's because I have to start all over again, you know...the usual building up of a new network, learning TOTALLY new stuff etc etc. Well, I just have to embrace the challenges that come along the way. As my mum said, at the very least, have confidence in your teamates, manager and the company. Start the new beginning with great expectations, optimism and most of all, CONFIDENCE! *listening to: 'Thrive' by Newsboys
Her BIG DAY today!
Nope, she is not married today (once she gets married, I will post the entry up, promise!)Hueyling graduated today! After 1 year plus of long-hours- after-work and studying during weekends, my dear girl has graduated with a Business Administration degree! I am SO PROUD of her because it is not easy to study part time with a full time job.I know that there were times she felt like giving up, but my girl persevered through! I remembered vividly last year when she told me that she wanted to study part time and was having a 'mental warfare' over which courses to take. I also remembered when she had complained about the number of projects she had to do etc...I admired her guts for studying part time with a full time job at hand. If I were her, I think I would opt for a part-time job provided my finances do not take a huge dip.Anyway, I am really elated for her. She has made it on her own,=) Another close pal of mine, Syl is also studying part time with a full time job. These 2 girls are really admirable! Syl will graduate bext Feb and I know she can't wait to graduate! =P It has been a long and gruelling journey for her during these years. I am confident that she will graduate with flying colours.Once again, CONGRATULATIONS 恭喜 Hueyling!listening to: 'Get High' by F.I.R
Learning to love yourself
Learning to love yourself can be a daunting task at times especially when you carry tonnes of burdens,be it financial,emotional,spiritual etc etc.....I was watching the Oprah show this morning and apparently, this was one of their topics for the show. The speaker, a celebrated psychologist (Miss Robin sth..she is a frequent speaker in Oprah's shows) talked about learning to love yourself. Though I did not finish watching the entire show, I know that this topic is a 'hot favourite' in many of Oprah's shows. Many of us are victims of 'not loving ourselves' and this can be due to many reasons:- Childhood abuse
- Emotional trauma
- Inferiority complex
- Disengaged from the society and the list goes on and on....
The author, yours sincerely, is also learning to love herself. It is a lie if someone says he/she truly loves him/herself because at some point in our lives, we dislike who we are. Learning to let go of certain things is one of the ways to love ourselves. We may still be holding tightly on some things of the past that hinder us from moving on, or bearing grudges against certain person(s) who have hurt us before.
Through my personal experience, learning to let go has benefitted my life greatly. Before the 'letting go', I was suffocated, like being stuffed in a small room with no air, no sunlight. For some of us, letting go ain't easy, seems like 'Mission Impossible'. That I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND. Because we have held on for so long that once you let you, there's a certain void, a certain kind of emptiness that is indesribable.
Slowly, take one step at a time, take deep breaths, look forward and most importantly, know that you are not alone is this mental warfare. You are never alone unless you allow yourself to.
*listening to: 'Anywhere Is' by Enya
